On Tuesday night I went to see the new movie Embrace which is an incredibly powerful documentary about the struggles that so many of us face around body image. It discussed the ways in which women are sent messages that their bodies are not good enough and the cycles of self-loathing and shame that build up over our lifetimes. And yet it was also an incredibly hopeful and empowering movie because it really made the case for another way. It set out a new approach for how we should honor and love our bodies as vehicles for life rather than objects to be judged by those around us (and ourselves).
As I was sitting there, I was thinking about all of the conversations I have had in the course of my work with clients, workshop participants, and friends about the anxieties that so many of us have about how our bodies look and how much shame and worry we experience around food, which we see as our Achilles heal. We believe that if we were just more controlled about what we ate, everything would be better. I say “we” here because this used to be my life. I lived in a constant state of obsession about what I was eating. I would negotiate with myself, deprive myself, count calories, workout to “earn” calories back, and not even enjoy the food I did eat because I was either anxious about whether or not I had made the “right” choice or I was wolfing it down because I was so hungry. In short, I was miserable. In the past few years, though, things have gotten much better for me. I no longer track what I eat or feel guilty when I have “junk food.” Sure, I still have days when I am not happy with my body or feel like I have overeaten, but those are now short lived, and often hormonal, which I’m cool with.
I am so grateful that this shift has happened for me and I wanted to share with you a couple of things that I truly believe have helped me to find this path:…